Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Jewish Toy Research Rages On...

Image from www.useajew.com
So, recently while shopping for Christmas presents for the children in my life, I stumbled across the 'Little People Chaunakuh Party Playset' (As seen below) which has now bec0me blog-famous. I, myself am not Jewish or affiliated with any other religion but I found this to be a little off putting. To me, this playset seemed very stereo-typical, especially if you consider the Little People Christmas playset features Santa Claus and some Little People elves (as though Little People could get smaller). If I was a Jew I would be irrate...but then I stopped and thought about it. Are there more so-called Jewish toys out there other than the obvious dreidel.

I decided to do some google research as I often do and also prepared for my search by watching VH1's All Access 'So Jewtastic' there new hour long special about Jewish contributions to pop culture. It's worth the watch if you get the chance. I learned a lot from their panel of Jewish experts...as I generally do! Anyway, on with my findings...

We obviously know about the Little People playset, costing $24.99 on Amazon (I'm not sure where else you can get it as I didn't find it any place else during my research). As stated in an earlier post, the first thought any one I know had was to purchase this and see if the baby fits in the oven. This makes us terrible people...but really we are only mocking whats being mocked in the first place. Blame 'Little People', not 'Us'.

Next, we have my two favorites...dueling bags of plague, if you will. The first being a bag of tiny, plastic, crap plagues costing $12.95. The second being a large bag of all ten plagues plushified, costing $19.95!

I'd say for the money, go with the plushies becasue they don't cost all that much more and they're way better than a bag of tiny, plastic crap capable of coming out of a Jewish gumball machine in a kosher market! They also remind me of the plushy germ representatives I found a while back. Anyway, these items can be found on www.judaism.com which is also the place I found this little dandy...The Dancing Matza Ball...

It costs $5.95 and dances with the mere pull of a string. Genius! Although, I never would have guessed it was a matza ball!

Next, we have from www.judaicaenterprises.com 'The Jewish Viewer' ($8.00) and 'Jewish 3D Viewer Films' ($5.00). There is really no other information about the viewer or what happens to be on the reels, so I can really only speculate and I think since the boy on the package looks quite happy, it must be bendy, bendy Asian girls...hence the price of only $5. I could not get the pictures of these items to upload, so you'll just have to go to the website if you want to see them. Also, there was no photo I could save of The Star of David Slinky ($3) from http://jewishbazaar.com

And then there's this FRIGHTENING 'Shimmy Doll' costing $28.00 from www.jewishtoy.com

Next...Mitzvah Millionaire The Board Game of Jewish Values from www.milechai.com and costing $24.95...

There are many other Jewish toys but these were my favorite yeilds of my research. I did also find that the toys don't stop at the children though. There are also Jewish pets toys and accessories.

Bagel with Cream Cheese Plush Dog Toy costing $8 from www.jewishsource.com

Kosher Plush Dog Bone Toy costing $6.75 from www.1-800-Dreidel.com

Star of David Tennis Balls, costing $1.35 each, also from www.1-800-Driedel.com

You can get a hand crocheted Jew hat (Kipot) with strings for your dog, costing $20 (www.jewishbazaar.com for picture as it could once again not be save to my PC). How do you know your dog is a Jew?

Luckily, there's a book to help you figure it out...

I don't know where you get it though and I have no idea what it costs or what it really even entails since the Jewish seem to be keeping their product information to a bare minimum.


Blogger Kinky Poe said...

I think I maybe in way over my head with this whole courting a Jew thing. I mean I'm up on my Jewish history & all, but the other shit is just flying over my head.
First, BEG got me thinking about Jewish weddings. So off to the Jew FAQ I went. Holy crap is it complex. Though I did find out in stead of a receiving line after a wedding the bride & groom go hang out alone before the reception. I'm all for that. Would you rather greet people or get laid before dinner? Then there is the whole crushing of the temple which involves breaking glass objects at the ceremony. Don't even get me started on the crap before the ceremony...It's all very complex.

Now I have you telling me even the pets may be jewish? I know the Jews have low numbers as a group, but does Fido really need a kosher toy? Why are the plagues available as a stocking stuffer? Do matza balls need to dance?

Wtf am I getting myself into?!?!

1:42 PM  
Blogger IvoryValentine said...

KP, they have KOSHER dog and cat treats as well...and some are gefelta (could be spelled wrong) flavored! It's all insane!

And yes, I'm afraid apparently the matza balls do need to dance. I think they're kinda like Christmas' dancing sugar plums...or at least they were in my dreams last night!

Regardless, I am still researching...even if only for your benefit...and of course for the sake of mockery! Back to Google I go!

1:49 PM  

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