All I want for Christmas...

(This is actually a couple days old)

1 - Bodysuit made entirely of the fuzzy side of Velcro
2 - 1/2 dozen Boston Cream donuts
3 - Dead bird, doesn't matter what kind, but preferably one that doesn't have Avian Flu (Do not lick dead birds!)
4 - All the goofy kneee socks in the world!
5 - Little People Hanaukuh Party Playset...for obvious reasons! (Remember folks, it's only $24.99 from Amazon. I wonder if it's cheaper in the Jewish off-season. Is there a Jewish off-season?)
6 - Facts of Life re-union, with or without George Clooney and Mackenzie Astin.
7 - My living room to be miraculously re-decorated. It would be awesome and way less work for me. I am already way too stressed and overworked to ever get it all done by myself.
8 - I am way into convenience and containment now, easy things in boxes, apparently.
9 - Pool table for such living room. It may inspire the motivation I'm seriously lacking right now.
10 - Heat! If I wanted to be this cold, I would move to Russia!
11 - Dead fish in the mail-boxes of all my enemies. Actual placement of dead fish in mail-boxes can wait until mid-July when it's 100 degrees.
12 - Shout! starring John Travolta and Jamie Walters on DVD. Travolta plays the harmonica. Heather Graham is in it too!
13 - Blanket made entirely of Fruit Roll-Up material...for obvious reasons.