Saturday, December 24, 2005

Merry Christmas!

Or, Feral Cats & Possible Merry Christmas Amputations...

So, we trapped an angry feral cat. It wasn't the pregnant one we were trying to capture to save her and the babies from freezing to death in the Wisconsin winter weather. We also couldn't take the damned thing to the humane society when we caught it because it was closed so, we let the thing out of the trap in an empty bedroom upstairs and baited the trap again to try to capture mommy-to-be cat. This I suppose was the first mistake.

The angry kitty was upstairs all week cause first, I forgot it was even up there (mistake #2) and then I fed and watered it when I remembered she was up there. Then, we captured another cat in the trap, also not the cat we were trying to get. I tried to get my barn door open to get my SUV out, but it got stuck on ice and wouldn't open any further or close again (This is something that happens a lot).

Finally, yesterday, hubby was off of work and we gathered up cat in the trap and put her in the truck and then had to deal with getting angry kitty into a carrier to take her as well. First off, this is a Tortie cat that blends very well with the color of the tile upstairs. I couldn't find her.

Found her and hubby put on some leather gloves and his thick winter coat and tried to grab her and get her into a carrier (a carrier now too small for my cats). This would have been mistake #3, seeing as how after much much clammering around and angry cat noise in and upstairs where everything echoes, the little bitch managed to bite hubby all the way through the leather glove and actually broke the skin.

So, then there was a required police report (mind you, we waited about an hour with three calls to the police before they finally showed up) and other assorted paperwork you have to fill out with the humane society when you've been bitten by a feral cat. And now we're left waiting for the next ten days to find out if the damned thing had rabies or not. This is a paranoid person's worst nightmare let me tell you.

I'm looking at his bite and up his harm every two hours and asking him how he feels. I think he's mostly aggravated by it at this point. So, here's to hoping we don't need to have him arm amputated and that he doesn't have rabies cause that would really suck!

In other happenings and such...

#1 - I have big plans to be both stranger and funkier in the coming year. I'm looking forward to more celebration of 'Kitch' (BEG, there might need to be more adventures where we purchase things like monkey candles for $8 each just because of their kitch-factor and because they smell good) and wearing a lot of crazy knee-socks. I'm knee-sock insane now if you hadn't noticed!

#2 - Everyone is saying something about The Wikipedia these days. I've read a gazillion and one blog posts about it and have actually been sent e-mails with Wikipedia discussion. People, leave the poor Wikipedia alone. It's like a retarded kid that doesn't know any better. And let's face it, Brittanica never calls or visits. I repeat, Wikipedia is a lonely, retarded child that needs our love!

#3 - Beauty pageants for cats where your cat wears a costume are NOT cool! If you are a person like this, you should be put in a costume and pummbled by angry citizens circling you with sacks of rotten oranges. Your cat doesn't enjoy these activities. In fact, your cat would kill you and eat your face off in ten seconds flat if it thought it had a chance and if it could move properly. But thanks to you, big, fat Whiskers is dressed like a poofy, fairy princess 'round the clock!

#4 - People of Southeastern WI, thought they would be having a white Christmas with all the snow that's been falling however the temp rise to 34 degrees and the new falling rain seem to be beating the shit out of that theory. So now we'll be having a dirty, gross, wet Christmas instead!

#5 - I was sitting here just now and it occured to me that BEG really uses the world around her. She utilizes resources well. She's grubby with information and grabbing for more constantly. She's so alive and brilliant and I wouldn't have her any other way.

And then of course, the truly sappiest song ever, the words, "People let me tell you 'bout my best friend" popped into my head and I had the great urge to yell, "Regulators!", but I didn't because hubby and the dogs aren't nearly as amused by this as BEG.

There was literally a montage in my head. A fucking montage of our friendship. See how derailed and delusional I get sometimes. I get distracted walking from my desk to the bathroom!

Anway, everyone, have a fantabulous whatever holiday you celebrate (Christmas/Chaunakuh/Kwanza/etc.). I hope everyone gets to spend some time with their loved ones or even their not-so loved ones and is full of good cheer for the new year!

P.S. If anyone knows where I can procure the movie 'Holiday Inn' on DVD for a decent price, please let me know. I found 'White Christmas', but it seems naked without the other one!


Blogger Monkey said...

Merry Christmas to you too.

I just found your blog out surfing and it's good - you write with feeling and from the heart - you have something to say. I enjoyed reading your adventures with ferel kittys!

Nice to meet you and keep it up.

1:10 PM  
Blogger Bubbles, Ink. said...

merry xmas

9:15 AM  
Blogger Black Eyed Gurl said...

Aww ::wipes a tear:: K- You're the best too. MOUNT UP!!

10:50 AM  

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